The first intoxication

I’ve spent the whole of today thinking about the first few months on the Internet. We had one of the first few internet accounts in India. An unassuming vsnl account perhaps. I had a powwow username. I can’t quite describe how avante-garde that was. I felt like I was on the edge of the bleeding-edge.

It comes back today with this news about Roger Ebert. It was one of the first times I realised my love of cinema wasn’t as immature and idiotic as I thought it was. It was legitimate. This love for film was real and absolute.

But among other things, I also discovered this today. So whilst I lamented the loss of Ebert, I heard this amazing rendition of Pehla Nasha. When I sit down to think of Pehla Nasha, I think of being a 11 year old. The idea of your ‘first intoxication’ is a bit heady when taken literally.

That’s what the internet felt like. An intoxication. To put it into perspective, it was the first addiction I had. The first time I felt absolutely absorbed into the fabric of the universe. The first crazy-handshake-tune of meeting strangers. The IRC chats that led to strangers who had no idea where I lived.

I was so eager to fall in love at that age. Because I was convinced that it was the ultimate high. Convinced by beautiful songs from the East and the West, I had been waiting to fall in love since I was about eight. When it finally happened, it was so depressing and a complete let-down. Yes, it was a new love – a new reason to wait. My heart was filled with the binary tune of handshakes and data streams.

Pehla Nasha. That it was.


Filed under Self

6 Responses to The first intoxication

  1. Can totally relate to the fledgling days of the internet in India. You have correctly associated it with the intoxication of first love! The creative rendition of ‘Pehla Nasha’ that you have shared is awesome! :)

  2. Rhea

    ” My heart was filled with the binary tune of handshakes and data streams.

    Pehla Nasha. That it was”. For me it still is :)

    How well you write :)

  3. loved the wording of the post!

  4. i was 13 when i first got to lay my hands on the delipidated computer that was supposed to have an internet connection; installed in the school computer lab. i was so stupid i wrote URLS on paper, lest i forget them later, the whole dotcom n stuff.

  5. Good to see you back :)

  6. Well written as always. BTW, I noticed that you have dropped ‘mamisms’ from you ‘About and Contact’! Any particular reason?

    And, BTW, leaving the ‘TrainerPlus’ comment there (and not deleting it) is so you…ha ha…