Dumbledore said, ‘After all, to the well-organised mind, death is but the next great adventure.’ And that is what the obituary page does – give the person a send-off on his next great adventure…

Deepika: That is kind – but the poem feels somewhat raw. I can’t put my finger on it..

aandthirtyeights: It’s sort of sad really. Right after I wrote this poem, the next day, I was told that an elderly great aunt had passed away. And I felt guilty for writing this poem. Perhaps it treats death too callously.

Vasuki: Thanks.

Nilu: Not really.

Guruprasad: Yes, you do appear to need some sleep. :)

jillumadrasi: Yes, I think you got it! The word grandmother was too long, so I lazily used “she”. And it creates too much of a dissonance. There’s more to it – but at least there’s thing to pick on now..

I think it’s slightly sad actually – this poem.

1. “Mr J. Vivekasundaram, *she* chants,”

In the previous line, the *she* was the grandmother. Now it is the girl. perhaps you should say the girl instead of she just to make the distinction.

2. also perhaps no comma:
which of these people, she knew.

it is true most old folks in Chennai read the The Hindu obit first thing in the morning. But not every single day

And some get seriously offended if friends don’t show up for the dhukkam-vechiruppu despite the announcement. But seriously it is possible to miss a few.

who says poems need to be executed like dictators? maybe some of the obituaries are actually well-kept secrets of state executions!

and maybe my sleep-deprived brain is finally curdled and seeping out through my ears!