What really pisses me off is when some organisations advertise like they want to kiss your feet and rub rose water on your butt, when all they want to do is warm their asses on their chairs.
One of the examples is ICICI. Cash in on a middle class dream of having a great service from an Indian bank. Feed them on emotional shit like pension plans, retirement solutions, security of money etc. And then come up with a mopey tag line that says ‘Hum Hain Na..’
I even thought one of their Lombard Insurance Plan advertisements was so bloody sexist.
Anyhow, like an idiot, I decided to open an account in ICICI. The M.O for the same is hilarious. They hand you an ATM card with a PIN, the internet banking username/ password as soon as you deposit cash, and not a word about activation.
So in a tearing rush, I try and issue an e-cheque to transfer some cash to another account of mine, and keep getting an error of ‘Transaction Not Allowed’. Confused I call up the call centre. Now, the call centre doesn’t know jackshit about banking. You use words like SB account, and they say ICICI doesn’t have an account like that. You grit your teeth and tell them that it is BANKING terminology for SAVINGS account.
They say, ‘Oh!’
Four days of calling and not getting a response beyond ‘Uh!’, ‘Oh!’, ‘Please hold on while I check ma’am!’ and ‘I am sorry, we cannot tell you that.’ I storm into the branch. I am grinned at … etc and told my account would be activated on Saturday. Monday afternoon, and I still cannot operate my account, and those jokers are sitting on MY money and doing the ‘Uh! Oh! Can’t tell you blah blah’ routine.
About to blast the Sales Exec at the Branch. Hand me the RedBull!